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Introduction:

went from fantasy to reality
My Nightmare ,is it a dream come true...???

These are the thoughts and feelings of a cucks life with calender inserts for a quick view into his head as he lives out is own fantasy/ nightmare with small inserts of each meeting my girl has with BBC.

Go on an overnight fishing trip and this is how she brought 9 years of sexual fantasy roll play and made it a part of our real lives. Roll playing, watching videos, pillow talk... whatever you want to call it, one thing is for sure , If you want it a reality it will be. If you dont, then keep it a secret. The thing is, if you have lived on a fantasy for 9 years and your girl decides to make it a reality while your gone fishing then that is a major violation. Or if she does it with someone that she sees everyday, like a boss, neighbor or even a coworker. Well thats what my little slut did. Yep her coworker who she has had eyes on apparently since she started working there. Her new place of employment is in the inner city and not only is she one of the only white women there, by far she is definetly the hottest. Sointerracial sex, BBC, black on white whatever.... we have watched interracial videos for 19 years and talked about how much it turned us on seeing these little white girls get the fucking of a lifetime. A fucking that I ( with my far less than average sized dick) could never provide for her by myself.

Its funny the comments under these videos will always contain some or a few white guys saying that blacks dont have the biggest dicks and that there are big white ones too. And it is true, some white guys do have big dicks, but they are far and few between. As do some black guys have small dicks... well I suppose that is true as well. Its not like I have held surveys or anything but being a guy that has played alot sports then later in life going to jail quite a few time then even going to prison twice you cant help but seeing alot of dick. Now this is just my experience but I think anyone that argues this is either a liar or just a hater. But without a doubt, no competition black guys on the average are much bigger than whites or any other race. I have never seen one that wasnt atleast 2 inches longer than my own and they all are much thicker. Soif you are a white guy with a big dick then you are one of the few and you shouldnt be into this genre.. But if you are in denial or werent sure, I hope this will help you understand what is happening and why so many white girls are fucking bbc .. cause size does matter...and on top of that they have endurance and straight up know how to make women cum .. Its not just sports that they out perform all other races ..and its not just in the porn industry that they excel, although if you were to look at the thousands of interracial videos that are out there you would see what me, my girl and waves of other white couples are discovering and that is their undeniably superior way that they satisfy white women in particular. These videos will remove all doubt and im sure will cause alot of jealous remarks from haters and others asking me what is wrong with me or calling me a faggot. I am just being real, Im not happy about it but it does turn me on seeing the looks on the girls faces and I am just keeping it real. So if you dont want to lose your girl to a black cock then stay away from any interracial videos..... so anyway, Back to my story,

So , the day after I went fishing she tells me kind of sex playing while we were fucking that she did it. I thought she was bullshitting me, and said yeah right. Usually she would say, "what if I did"? and I would reply "what could I do, its nobodies fault but my own" But this time she said its true and she assured me that she did. Instantly I felt betrayed that she waited till I went fishing to do this. I did bring it on, but still inside I was pissed and yet turned on. I have thought about it for years, we have placed ads, chatted, traded pictures, but never did I really think it was going to happen. She would always say that I could only get mad at myself if she did and I agreed. But then again she had been saying that for years. We have purchased dildos and vibrators to try and make up for my inadequicy, and for a long time it has worked. But nothing can replace the feeling of an actually person connected to that toy. So thats what we said we will look at it like he is just a toy. Thats all good except she sees him everyday at work. The guy is 6 ft 6 and has the body of a underwear model and get this... he has a cock that is close to a foot long!! I shit you not, I have her film it each time now and though I got 1 halfway decent recording that reveals his tool. each recording provides me with proof that I cant compete with this guy. She denies it but she is building a relationship with this guy. She has fucked him 11 times now that I know of and fucked this other dude carl twice and one other guy Kelvin once. Both of them were from craigslist and I was there to witness her getting a cock well over twice my size. one of them Kelvin was really huge and the smallest guy of the three. He was like 5 foot 9 and his thick cock was easily 12inches and as thick as coke can.but anyway... I say this because 11 times are all i know about but I am 90% sure there has been atleast one other. I think there was also an occasion that she sucked his dick at her work when she was on her period. So anyway heres where my own demons come to surface. I am so turned on by it and it bums me out at the same time. I am mad at myself that it turns me on. What is wrong with me? I am not gay, and I do love her. But I know this has done unrepairable damage. She has stated that this is making us stronger. I could see where she can say this because she is the one getting the absolute best pussy poundings of her life. And yes she has told me this. Her last session was 2 nights ago . It lasted 55 minutes and he brought her to over 16 body racking orgasms. She finally admitted to squirting and said over and over that it was the best she has ever had. She has assured me that she will continue fucking him and me but when we fuck she ends up using a toy and my dick ends up in my hand. I will add more later 3:04 AM 8/4/2015

So I am back and since my last insert she placed an ad and we got a room and this guy Trey came over and fucked her good for about an hour. He had went out drinking with friends so he wasnt able to perform to his standards he claimed, but still made her squirt 3 times. I watched her worshipping his cock which was close to 3 times my length and 3 or 4 times thicker. She told me afterwards it was his girth that made her squirt . Well he has contacted me since and wants another go at her and says he was sorry and promises he will be sober and will give her the fucking she deserves. I dont doubt that he will get another chance to redeem himself. In the meantime her number 1 fuck has had his girlfriend over at his place all weekend, and now its Sunday night and she has made it pretty clear to charge up the camera phone cause she is going to try making a decent video for me to watch and play with myself to. This will take place while im at work of course. I dont know what it is about this whole cuckold thing that appeals to me. I guess it has something to do with me getting to be the beta. Seeing her get pleasured in ways I could never come close to doing for her, the whole taboo thing, me being a racsist, the contrast or just the sheer size of these guys....Maybe its all of the above. A few things are for sure, 1) She never wants to quit. She doesnt want to hurt me and says she will quit but she wont. Nor would I make her. 2) It is starting to make changes to her pussy. 3) It is definetly getting easier for both of us to handle, I just dont know how much longer she will even want me around. Because once the dishonesty starts again, that will be the end of us. Im sure it will be mutual at that point. For the meantime, I guess I will just enjoy the show and get used to my hand. It has been seeing alot more action than usual lately. The funny thing is.... I always play with myself with her videos on... I will add more when it happens.

Yesterday I was at work when she texted me that he wants to put his cock in her. Im thinking what a coincidense she just got off her period. Well she sends this to me at 5pm said she got his text at 3pm, so Im thinking she got it already . She says no.... and then tells me she is over it.

2 days later....So last night we are having sex and she is like a desert . fingering her pussy for over 10 minutes no moisture. Then I bring up her coworker and within 30 seconds she is sloppy wet and bucking on my hand. She gets up on my dick and within 60 seconds I lose it cause she is just totally grinding and frantically fucking me. Nevertheless I failed and left her hanging and a hour and a half later she is dressed and heading for work... Do i think she will fuck him today? Come on.... I got to go to work now myself I will let you know later. friday aug 21 2015

well its saturday night and she claims she didnt... But he texted a few times. His first one said " I want to put this cock in you" she replied I do to but have too much to do after work.

We have had sex twice since that last insert friday morning and both times I left her hanging. Not on purpose just un able to fill her up properly. Both times she has told me how she needs bbc and that she is going to fuck her other boyfriend later that day.

Meanwhile because of that ad she placed, we are getting swamped with emails from all these huge cocked black studs , all telling her how they would service her and make her cum . Or how they willl turn her into their own bbc slut and why is she even with me and my pathetic little white dick. I must say, they are coming from every angle and its just a matter of time till she meets one that is going to do it for her in a way that will take her from me. And though I have noone to blame but myself it still bums me out after I get off playing with myself.. I am fucked up in the head for sure. Dont know how it got to this, but all i know is that fetishes come and go, but the one thing that has been in our sex lives for me over 10years and her 9 is bbc. In particular bbc in white women. Married white women is even better. It seems to be getting more popular and once you start watching this porn you will never stop. It grows and grows till its the only thing that associates you and sexual pleasure. It sounds stupid but you will see when you get off, there is always the thought or the vision of black cock going in a white girl that got you there.

I will add more later, I think we might be getting a room tonight..... if so.....here we go again!!

Well we didnt get a room but yesterday after work she decided she wanted some sex. ( after a week and a half of not so much as to mentioning sex to me) and bbc has been texting her telling her all week saying he wants to give her his big black cock. So she was on her way when she informed me and this was at 445 pm . So knowing it will be getting dark soon and the recording will get cut off I start getting a bit pissed off. But I let her do her thing for a hour and a half then start getting really pissed. After numerous calls I head over there and she is still there . Finally after 2hours and 15 minutes she tries telling me that it wasnt that great and that she couldnt get him off. Well I will never know i guess but one thing is for sure ... she did! She got over an hour of decent footage while she fuck and sucked him. I will give more details later but basically she tries telling me that I am all she wants or needs,, LMAO... ok and I believe her.... not! Anyway, there are 2 other guys that want to do her tonite and tomorrow nite one of them she has had before and the bigger one who this will be the first time with is on saturday. I said then you can decide if I am all you want and need ... To be continued...

Well she got 1 of the 2 this weekend but not the new guy. Still she got almost 2 feet of black cock on thursday and friday it would have been close to a yard if lastnights didnt flake. We went to the beach sat and passed out sat night. It is sun am and though I dont know what today will bring, I am sure she is already plotting and planing her next visit with coworker. Friday night after Carl had left she fucked me and was assuring me that she is addicted to black cock and how good it tasted. She then went on to tell me that her pussy belongs to bbc and if I tried to forbid her from fucking him, she would just quit telling me when they make contact. As it is now, she claims that she tells me everytime he texts her or vice-a-versa. So there it is there, do i want to know or not ... Should I stay or go.

It does make me jealous but it makes me hard and I get off watching the recordings and thinking about it. I get mad but most of it is my own doing and I have noone to really blame but myself...I knew she would end up loving bbc like she does but I kept watching those movies with her. The one thing I really hate is the kissing she does with him. They are always kissing and that pisses me off. Anyway I have some big decisions to make or just sit back and take my medicine and get what I deserve. After all I do deserve this for cheating on her, but how many times? the problem is she doesnt want to stop now...uggggghhhhh!! AND I CANT BLAME HER!! She cums so hard with them and the only time she cums with me is when I use a big toy or she just finished fucking one of them and is talking about their cocks while on me. And only then.

well its a 3 day weekend and there hasnt been much talk of bbc because she is supposedly on her period. But today she says its over and she is ready to get a room and party. This could only mean 1 thing..... stay tuned. to be continued.....

9/14 Ok today she got it while I was at work or just before i left, she had made plans to go over there on a monday morning and he brought her to 3 or 4 orgasms before leaving a load on her chest. Of course I get an attitude when I get home (as usual). Anyway, the video is decent but he finished up in less than a hour. which is quick for him.. apparently he had no problem staying hard and he was clearly digging her out deeply.. They were planing a round 2 but it didnt happen... this may be a long week.. more to come

Here it is the following friday and yesterday we had sex and she came on me and a toy but still clearly wanted more so before me getting a nut she texted him and he said come over so she got off of me rinsed off and was on her way leaving my dick in my hand ... I couldnt sit here so i told her I was leaving and she replies " i know" but was still going to go through with it even though it was totally dark outside so I got pissed and kept texting until she cancled out of guilt. I stayed out till 1am came home and we fucked and she fantasized about alvin as we fucked. I know its not over.

Saturday the 19th i grabbed her phone to see if what I suspected was true and there it was ... She had been in contact with him on several occasions and never said anything about these calls. On top of that there is a new guy in her swimming class that they have been getting really friendly and for some reason that slipped her mind to tell me about him...And dude knows this guy as well so there is definetly more going on then she is telling me about.

so here it is Wednesday the 23rd of sept and we just got back from an overnight fishing trip yesterday, but today she gets the day off and of course the minute I leave to work she is playing with herself watching bbc videos and gets all worked up for her bbc. I suspected it so I started texting her what she was up to, she says she hadnt even thought about it till I mentioned it and thats when she told me that she was watching movies and fucking herself with a big black dildo. But dude never crossed her mind.... bullshit!! So a half hour later she informs me that he texted her and wants her over there. She is all about it and is begging me to let her go. so finally after not saying yes I fsay well u better not dissapoint him. Like that she says ok, after she was acting like could care less. So after work I get in my truck to meet up with her .. she finally replies and says she is not going and he got mad at her so ensues a big time arguement and now she has claimed it is all over with him.. So this is where we are

for the next 2 days similiar shit, she makes plans then breaks them.{so she says) . Then she was on her period and it convienantly lasted until sunday night. I could tell by what she was wearing to work that she was ready this week.nothing monday but tuesday she tells me she was going to fuck him while i was at work. there were a couple reasons I didnt like this but until the last minute she was telling me she needs it. but then backed out.come thursday and it happened:

She went there while I was at work of course. He discovered the phone recording them after 10-15 minutes of the best pussy pounding ive seen out of him yet. He was relentless just plowing her the way she loves and the way I could never beable to duplicate. So the phone was turned off and she decides its ok to stay and fuck him some more. So at this point I have no idea what was said or done. ! thing for sure she let me know that it was the best sex she ever had with him or in her life. I could see it was heading that direction, and he didnt cum. So 2 days later she was trying to go finish the job while I was at work again, but then opted out.

My personal note is this.... I need to stop this with him. She loves his cock and his body and his technique. She absolutely loves sucking his huge black cock and now is talking about him taking her ass. Yea i need to end this which is fucked up to try denying her the best fuck of her life especially when it gets me hard as a rock . so ..... i dont know what to do... she has a couple ads placed and we have had some good replys, but it seems she is just all about his cock. If she isnt, then it wont be long till she is. She can easily tell me now that she she needs his cock and how much she loves it. so...... more to come

Well she did it again... I went on an overnight fishing trip with my neighbor and when I was able to finally get a signal on my phone she had texted me that he wanted to fuck her. Did she wait for a response? Hell no, but she brought the pen camera and got a couple of hours worth of her getting fucked real good bringing her to one orgasm after another. You can hear my texts coming in towards the end and her dissapointment hearing them as well. But it didnt stop her or him. He just pounded harder bringing her to a couple crazy body racking orgasms before he finally busted a big nut deep inside her pussy. I told her no more contact with this guy but she has and she will . The only thing I will accomplish by doing this is get her to start lieing to me about her contact with him. Does she want him? of course, does she tell me? yes ...every time we have sex. She can not get off with my dick alone and the last couple times she doesnt let me fuck her for more than 5 minutes and she lets me finish myself with my hand while she uses her toy. We even got a room with a jacuzzi and she wouldnt do me ... she watched their movies over and over and got off doing so..... that and stuffing her pussy with a toy that is 4 times my size. Laughing at me stroking my pathetic little dick till it dribbled on my stomach.... Im so screwed up in the head... And to think this was all my idea at one point. more to come....just not on video...pfffftttt

So after 2-1/2 weeks she goes to his house 2 days after my birthday. She has been craving it and begging me to let her ..so i do ... And i want her to... hoping she will finally bring back another decent video. She could have but she pointed it at the ceiling and all I got was audio of what she calls the best sex she has ever had.....She tells me that each time she does him and i tell her yeah thats what you always say... She says because its true... it keeps getting better and better.. So this is on a friday night and we end up at a hotel cause we had a guy off craigslist coming over to do her. The goal was to get her a yard of black cock this weekend.. but as it turns out he was not the guy in the pics so we struck out... She ended up playing with her pussy and making me watch as I beat off my baby dick. But come the next day she was back over to alvins getting slammed again. After 1 hour of pussy pounding he discovers the recorder and destroys it and throws a tantrum. Still she stays there for 3-1/2more hours till she comes home empty handed no video but with her pussy beaten up.He has done irreversible damage to her pussy. I didnt htink it was possible but he has opened her up and now its brought out a hunger that can only be fed by thick black cock . so once again after maybe 3 minutes of my rock hard pencil dick she resorts to her toy and is able to cum in a matter of seconds. She falls asleep with it inside her and her video playing of al doing her proper.

She says its over with them that he wont even acknowledge her at work... I think its bullshit and they will be right back at it in no time.

dec6th just 2 weeks after the discovery, and after several attempt by my girl come to find out, he text her today saying he needed to fuck her . She says I thought you were mad. He replied that he has needs and she has some bomb pussy. Anyway she was about to start her period so she declined the offer. one thing for sure .... she hadnt smiled all weekend until she started texting with him.

Here is the problem, she wont beble to record the next time and she totally made it obviusly clear that there will be plenty of next times. So now I am screwed no matter how you look at it. The only option I see is to let it happen then then break him off.

Im not sure where this leaves us, I dont know if she has texted him yet.. I know she is needing it because out of the blue today she starts writing her story of her bbc adventures... Im supposed to be going to west virginia for 10 days ... I can only imagine what she will be up to...All I know is that pussy is getting spoiled by thick black cock and soon she wont even let me touch her bbc garage. She told me she is already starting to cut me off. The truth is, I cant blame her. I had been warned over and over and knew how she would be after having a black man fuck her like only a black man can. But the thought turned me on and it still does. Fact is , for the 10+ years we have been together she needs to finally get some for all the teasing and empty promising i did. If i have to sit and watch or listen for the rest of my days, so be it. Her pussy needs and deserves so much more than my skinny little baby dick and BBC is the answer . I am defeated.!! To say that they are sexually superior than me is a huge understatement .They seem to have been born with technique and stamina and most importantly.To him and so many others, I have a young childs penis in comparison ....So.......from this day forward, I give her my written blessing.?? Have her record the audio? I havnt decided.... stay tuned for more as soon as this period is over

Well here it is , a new year and one that promises more of the same. After a few failed attempts they finally hooked up again Jan 9th. She came home after work to take a shower and put on some new lingerie that she bought for him. I find this out after the fact. She recorded the audio and what I got was about 45 minutes of her having orgasm after orgasm. It has definetly been on her mind, and mine too while we are in bed she tries to make it work with my dick she really does, but i fall way short. How short you ask? well so did I, and she said im a third of his length and not even half as thick. So I know I can never compete with him physically. that and the fact he has like zero body fat........So , if he fucked her good on the 9th then what he did on the 11th is fucking super human. she brought back the recorder of him absolutely just owning her pussy for over a hour and a half. Listening to him telling her things and her confirmations telling him her pussy is his and she loves his cock makes for good recording but it was all from the heart. There is way to much personal dialoge going on before , after, and during. He is more than just a toy and after a year of fucking her , it is clear there are feelings going on. A few years ago I remember asking her " could you fall in love with a guy with a 10 inch cock just for his cock?' .... Her reply was " oh absolutely"! And backs it with sex is 90 percent of a relationship....So, I allow this because I know its important to her and it does get me hard. I dont care so much for the audio but anyway ....it seems I should nip this off soon if I still can.. I dont really think I can stick with my decision if i try. It would be nice to find someone else that she would atleast try to replace him but so far not happening. If there is one thing about her I know and its that when she finds something she likes she keeps it around until it no longer has a use......I would say the end but I doubt it....

2/10 2016 So since I wrote last time she went over and was finished in a half hour. I bought here a new k chain video cam and of course she went at night so all i got was audio. She said she owed him one since the last time when he brought here to atleast 50 orgasms in a hour and half assault on her pussy but he didnt nut.. So apparently she achieved her objective and as a bonus had 5 or 6 body racking orgasms herself..... this was 12 days ago and she is dying to get over there, in fact last2 nights in bed of course I fail to make her cum and lastnight she tells me she needs his cock twice a week. Then asks me if I can handle that...... do I have a choice?/??? more to come

So its early friday am and lastnight she got her hair done and today is a half day for her. Al tried hooking yesterday but she said she has a hair appt. He said " your trying to stay away from my dick?" and she was like no way she wants it so bad. But i guess from what she told me is that he will be busy today and tonight but I guess we will have to see. They have both said this before so we will see. One thing is for sure lastnight i tried to make her cum with my dick alone... I used to beable to do it if we were watching bbc on tv or if i was talking about some bbc taking her from me and just delivering the most relentless assault on her pussy. That usually does it but now it doesnt even come close. The geography of her pussy has changed considerably and she promises it will just get looser for me. I dont know how it couldnt ...unless this guy just quits fucking her all together....pffffttt thats not happening... He loves her pussy almost as much as she loves his cock. They are both convinced that each others sex was made for the others. My chick is always reassuring him that her pussy belongs to him.....As for me.... the older I get the smaller it seems. I remember when i was younger my dick was 5-1/2 inches.. these days i cant get 5-1/2 with a pump . On the norm it is just over 4 inches and it doesnt stay hard like it used to and my stamina has fallen as well. .........thats right, i can bust one with a soft dick....but anyway im going to try finding somone new to help take her mind off of her coworker.. more to cum....................

Well like I suspected his plans fell thru and he hit up my girl to come over. She had told me she had to meet with her boss after school anyways so nothing was going to happen. She told me this before he texted her. Then all of a sudden she met up with her boss at 2 and then she informs me to make sure the camera was charged cause she was going to go over there. She got home around 4 and I wasnt really down for her going but I was still hard.. Dont ask me why, but I didnt want her to see that I was,so I stayed in the garage. Well all my hints I gave not to go fell on deaf ears. She claimed she wanted to make me a good recording but keep it real... it would be dark in a half hour ands she was on her way. she replied to a few more of my texts but this visit was in no way for me , it was for her and the release of frustration that she had for being left hanging during sex with me. She was there for about a hour and a half and once again, all i got was audio and as usual he brought her to more deep orgasms than you can keep track of. some of them seem like a continues orgasm lasting a few minutes or other wise they are just back to back to back. Whatever he is doing it is working like no other she has ever experienced. Her pussy is a flood gate for his cock and he knows he is by far the best she has ever had. He knows she gets nothing even remotely close to it at home and I think he relishes the fact that she is completely addicted to his cock.

So here it is tuesday feb 23rd and I am almost 100 % positive she will be looking to hook up with him today. We had sex sat sun and monday night and my dick couldnt do it for her so I shared her pussy with a 11 inch dildo that is 4 times my thickness as well. That made her cum pretty good but still not like with him... this morning I fucked her before she went to work but left her hanging big time, so thats why I know she will be getting some big black cock tonight. Plus she feels like she owes him for not getting him to nut last time. So, with that being said I will keep you posted and in the mean time I will just take my matters in my own hand so to speak and beat my little dick up just thinking about what is going to happen later today.... more to cum....

Well it didnt happen that night or the next ...Nor did we fuck but come thursday , the day before her surgery , despite all the pleading and everything being wrong with it. She went over there ...claiming she wanted to make me a video .. But of course when she returns she has no video. She recorded the audio, but he listens to the worst nigger music of all time which just pisses me off listening to it. But you can clearly hear her getting off one right after another for a good hour and it ends with him blowing his load on her face. during the recording you hear atleast 10 texts from me but that just made them fuck harder. So its been a week since ive gotten laid and today she brought him up out of the blue. So i know she is counting the days till her period ends. to be continued

Well after surgery, we didnt have any sex for almost a week

It is wednesday march 9th

and when she left for work she did it too quietly , I knew something was up today. I could feel it. But anyway she went to Drs appointment and got good and not so goood news and was telling me about it when Alvin texted her to come over after work. All of a sudden she is ready for sex. She wasnt kidding , she has been fucking me less and less even when we have sex , i spend most of the time stroking my baby dick and she works that big toy. Sorry about my luck and I cant say I blame her or get upset . I would do the same thing probably even worst. For the most part , she does try to make my dick work she really does. But after just a few minutes or less she starts getting frustated and its not long before her carnal hunger comes out. Anyway, after the news she got at the doctors I told her that she had the green light to go get her pussy pounded and she said thank you.She did bring the camara and a pussy pounding is what she got. She sucked and fucked that bbc for over a hour and a half. He never nutted and now I know my girl feels obligated to finish the job soon. we fucked the next morning and she said she was going to try fucking him this weekend. I am telling her to get as much as possible before starting the chemo but she didnt get a hold of him. So.... here it is Monday march 14th and daylight savings has begun .... I forgot to mention that this last session they had marked their year anniversary since she started fucking him. I believe it was going on before this but she will never claim it. Anyway, we have had sex everyday since thursday... hahaa 4 times and each timemy dick failed me but my tongue got in her twice. She loves that but it still doesnt make her squirt .She would try with my dick the first 2 days but the last 2 times she has went right for our big toy and left my little dick in my hand... Do I think she will be fucking Al today.... I dont see any reason why she wouldnt. but I will keep you posted. Im stuck at home all day and will probably be rubbing one out a few times today .... more to cum

So March 18th

she got a nice session for the friday night . She recorded it and although you cant see very well atleast she made effort. No effort in trying to cum though ... She gets off every time with him . He just slips that huge cock in her and she goes nuts. What a different girl he gets to fuck then the girl i live with. She is the meaning of a black cock slut. She loves it and has no problem telling him or me.. He has done permanent changes to her pussy and he loves it too. She has stated to both of us that it is his pussy now and she will do whatever he wants her to do!!

Monday, on her vacation and chemo in 2 days ... last night we had sex but I was unable to make her cum even with the toy, She said she was going to fuck him today and she did. Actually half way decent camara coverage and although she says it wasnt that good she still came all over his huge cock and she worshipped it too for quite a while. It ended when he dumped his load of jiz deep in his slaves pussy.

so here it is tuesday morning and last night we had some terrible sex . she wasnt into it neither of us came and i dont think she is sexually attracted to me anymore. I almost feel she is grossed out by me. And if you were to look at her reaction on his cock and compared it to how she acts with me, you would say she is sypmathetic and is doing it out of obligation almost..... I need to shut them down but I think it will do more bad than good. More to cum..... Tuesday we were fucking and she couldnt get off with me no matter how hard i tried, then i mentioned Al's cock and she came all over the place so we kept going and she was trying to satisfy her need but it wasnt happening... so soon she started pleading to me for more but it wasnt mine she wanted more of so i told her she could go back over there today and that i understand. So she got off of my dick while we were fucking and she had me go get her phone so she could text him. He instantly replied " do you need another fix"? she said I can be out the door in 30 minutes or less. and with that she jumped out of bed and started getting ready to go get "filled up properly" as she put it . She says she needs that cock and loves it. She says it feels so good and taste better than any cock she ever sucked. Also she has told him that her pussy was made for his cock and that he owns it and that he touches places in her that nobody has ever touched. when i fuck her now , her pussy is so loose around my little dick she can barely feel it and laughs at me. In the recordings you hear him telling her to look at her pussy gripping his meat. She calls it black cock therapy So here it is a couple months later, my girl is still doing chemo therapy and my chick has texted him a few times it is clear he is not interested...... until today. He texted her while we were at the driving range. Now I know i never made the insert of their last session, which was basically the same as usual .... him bringing her to over 10 orgasms and her squirting a few times. This time she only squirted once. It was july 6th and she went over there for a good hour and got what she has been so missing for over 2 months. I know this because we seldom have sex mainly because she really doesnt get anything out of it. Can you blame her? When we do the only way she gets wet is by thinking and talking about Al big cock filling her up.Of course then it gets me going to and I will usually bust a nut and like always leave her hanging. Since that last session 12 days ago she has been in contact and he is definetly ready to own that pussy again. He has texted when we were out of town and she has insured me she will be going to get what she needs. I will say this ... When we fuck , it is like I am feeding a grown up with baby portions. Her sex drive has slowed down considerably especially with me but with him she is still good to go .

We havnt had any sex for about a week now and she does not seem affected by it, I know she is waiting for him to get back from vacation, in the mean time she is just laying around here not doing much. I cant expect her to be all over my dick like the old days.... them days are long gone believe me. She has had a real cock for the last 14 months . she has been reshaped, resized, and she says repaired. Definetly didnt help size things up for me.... All I can do is wait......

well he is back in town, and with all the doctors appointments and work and bills, my girl has been stressing out and was even falling into depression. We probably fucked 2 times in the last month.

So when he got back he sent her a picture of his back as he was going into some tropic ocean. She replied "yummy" so when she showed me ,I asked are you going there she said no..... Then further down their messages she tells him that i will be leaving on a fishing trip for 3 days... He says good but he still needs to pound that pussy.

Friday Aug 12th

So, according to her she never went while i was fishing. Summer break was over and after the first week back to work and she reached her limit on friday. I receive a text that she was so stressed that she might have to reach out and call him today. And reach out she did and made plans for 6 pm on a friday night. The fact that he was able to do it on a friday nite makes me suspicious to where they are in this year and a half relationship. So anyway when she returned , she had a smile from ear to ear with claims that he outdid his best and absolutely owned her pussy then dumped his load in her mouth. After listening to this recording I must agree she has some of the most intense sounding orgasms I ever heard from her in previous recordings.In person, with me, haha she doesnt even come close to making these sounds. He fucks her you can see and hear her in a state of almost drunk ecstacy , Like an out of body experience. With me totally coherent and after a while frustration , irritation sets in . So I will roll play and bring up his fucking her and within seconds she is drenched as her mind drifts off to visions of his cock and the assault on her pussy that he provides.

So anyway, she is back to herself again and when we went to bed she was still horny thinking about him but at the same time had some guilt for how much she enjoyed it. After a couple of minutes rubbing u on me she sits on top of me and easily it falls in. She is grinding away and after a few minutes of talking about her and Al she is cumming on my dick. So she gets off and lays down next to me and falls asleep leaving me hanging.

She has a renewed attitude and told me with no joking or hesitation that she will be getting it again and again until she can no longer get it......As i expected

My question and concern is this... She has been fucking him for almost 2 years now..... Is it even possible for her to claim the sex just keeps getting better and not have any feelings for him. Or is she secretly falling in love with him. Because in these recordings she is in , she is a different person. A person that is experiencing feelings she has never came close to feeling with me, but yet claims he is just a toy.....more to come....8==@

Here it is the following tuesday the 16th of august

thihs morning we finally fucked, I tried nibbling on her ear and rubbing her everywhere to try to get her wet enough to even let me in and after some poking and proding i finally got in. In a laydown doggy style i am working awayand she is trying everything to just beable to feel me it seems. Alvins cock has changed her pussy in so many ways and when I tell her this ,she tells me " oh god yes". The toy we used to play with when I fucked her she claims irritates her pussy. She used to get off on it pretty good tho. Now with just me in her she experiences frustration,irritation,exhaustion and easily annoyed. But usually I can mention Alvins cock and she goes to another place in her head and is able to nut while grinding on my Mini package. Not today. And she did get pretty snazzyied up for work. So Im thinking today might be another day that Alvin is contacted to finish the job that I started.

I knew it would be like this, Its just like all the stories I have read , all the warnings, claims and confessions. Then you read the comments underneath that say its not true that we are all on average the same size... That ladies and gentlman is pure 100 percent bullshit. First off if you have a 8 inch cock then you could think that and actually believe it. but the average white guy is closer to 6. And I myself,at just over 4, knew she would be addicted to it after the first time. And still we played, I guess I just never really thoght she would go thru with it and if so she wouldnt find a guy that uses a 12 inch ruler to measure his cock. But she did, and he is closer to the end of a 12 inch ruler than I am using a 6 inch ruler. No all men are not ccreated equal.

But dont get me wrong despite all this , I am glad she is experiencing this now . because with our age and health issues.... Who really knows what tomorrow will bring. So if you are a white girl reading this and your bf or hub isnt quite hitting the spot for you. Dont settle. If you think it is as good as it gets, your wrong. And if your a white guy with an average size dick or less, do the right thing and treat your woman to a real fuck ing. A fucking you could never provide by yourself . If you really love her , you will support this. quit being selfish,Our ancestors were doing it , If you have read this far then you know that you are curious. Let them do one of the things they were put on this earth to do!

Save all the hater comments, If you read this whole thing then you are already one of us. It might make you mad when you realize the truth but its too bad if you cant accept it.

Sept 11,12th

They are in contact again and its going to happen real soon.........When she and I make love , I leave her hanging big time everytime....So I totally understand.

sept 14th

She went over there at 8 pm and was there for a hour at first she was actiing like she couldnt get wet but then broke it down and said once he put his dick in her she was able to cum immediatly and over and over. listening to the tape it was amazing how quick she came and a few times she is cumming so hard she is screaming into a pillow. nope she has never done this for me and the toy even. This guy is her get well therapy.He possesses a 100%,without a doubt the perfect match for her pussy. To say that he owns it is to state the absolute obvious. Here it is saturday and she is already thinking about hitting him up again any day. I think she wants to step it up with him to atleast once a week. I will be first to admit ..that when she comes home after getting dugout from him she is glowing and kinda floats around the house. When she finally comes back down to earth she is still super giddy and that is when I realized that in fact this was the best treatment for her well being. She is going to be getting more and more as her health improves cause this guy loves her pussy... especially when its wrapped around his long thick black cock!!

more to come...............

Oct 2nd marathon fuck

October 7th today will be the 2nd day this month already that Alvin has stepped in for me. On Oct 2nd he delivered a 5 hour marathon fuck that pornstars would have appreciated

oct 11th details below

Yesterday october 14th was the 4th time this month and also his birthday. She also went 3 days before on the 11th. That particular session lasted for an hour . Although that may seem like a quickie listen to the tape and you will hear that he took care of biz . Something i cant seem to do given all night.

So yesterday I had to work from midnight to 530am and wouldnt you know it ...supposedly Alvin texted her at 3 am he and his buddy were all drunk and sshe went over there and attempted to do them both after she gave me her word she was only doing Alvin. But as it turns out , the other guy couldnt get hard. Too much alcohol and apparently disrespected her.... I dont know how that is possible... if you go over to a couple black guys looking to get fucked at 3am and they are drunk, I think you have thrown any possibilities of being respected out the window. Just saying... She still ended up sucking on the other guy and getting a couple nuts from Alvins cock which is always good for atleast 1 or 2 orgasms.

Anyway after almost 3 hours she comes back home to say it was all bad and that she is over it. But she is not and talked to him again this afternoon... I give it 4 days tops and they will be joined at the hips again... till then...

Well as it turned out the last session wasnt that bad in fact she is back there again right now so being today

October 16th . the month is just halfway over with. She has been very delberate in telling me she will be needing it alot more often then what I am used to. So today is a new record for 5 times in 1 month and last night when we were fucking she had me go get her phone from the living room so she could text him. There is no way possible that my dick can compete with his , and we are both on the same page and understand this as the solution to her not being fully satisfied at home.So where does that leave me? well seeing how I am the one that watched interracial first and me being less than average size. Add in the fact that I knew what BBC does to white women and didnt end this at the start... Im pretty much left with my tiny dick in my hand even when she is here. Last night she made me finish my self as she held down on the base while i stroked my man clit. She used a 11 inch dildo and a vibrator and still doesnt even come close to what he does to her pussy. So now I wait until she gets home then I will listen to the recording and I will add some more to this entry.

Its been 2 hours and she still is not back.... She is getting a true fucking right now cuz Alvin feels he has to make it up to her for what happened 2 nights ago. Which is just made up drama cuz the other dude was kind of forceful she said and he couldnt get hard.... Obviously Alvin is handing out full body spasm orgasms right now and my chick is getting them one after another...

So its Monday the 17th and she is back over there and its 10pm who knows when she will return.... Well as it turns out she was back around midnight and she gave up her ass to him for the first time last night, She hasnt told me anytrhing about it and being today is thursday oct 20th and she hasnt fucked me since sunday what am i supposed to think. I texted her earlier and asked if she has been in contact and she says no and havnt even thought about him..... but she says she wants me..... Right ! like I really believe that.... Anyway its all bullshit Im sure. She is just waiting a couple days to let me cool off. Im sure she will fuck him on my birthday just to keep things in perspective. So last month she took a load down her throat and this month in her ass. To listen to the recording is to hear a woman getting the fucking of a lifetime..So i asked her and she confirmed without a doubt the best sex she has ever had.... Enough said

So the tally is 6 times in the month of october

So this morning friday oct 21st she fucked me in the morning... I lasted about 10 minutes before I nutted and of course she wasnt even close until she started telling me the only way her pussy gets off but that made me nut so it left her hanging big time. Bad enough to where she has been hitting him up tonite a few times.. tonight she actually told me that he made her squirt multiple times ..so im listening to the recording right now and she is getting it so good as I type this..

No i would be such an asshole and hated by her if I tried to stop this. First off they wont stop. She would just stop telling me about it. Then the next step is her just leaving me because there is no way on this earth as long as she is breathing she will need his cock forever... So it looks like either tonite or tomorrow so I will keep you posted

So here is the october update... she actually got him to fuck her on my birthday and she did him first. When we fucked was hours later and was very quick .

So now the 24th of october It is 930 pm she is in the shower right now etting ready for number 8 for the month and its not over... still a whole week left. thats right 8 times in 3 weeks. That is better than once every 3 days. and the thing is there is still a week left so to think she might get it 2 or 3 times before october is over is a real good possibility. lets say she does get it 10 times. that is over 110 inches of cock this month or about 11 feet of cock.... If she fucked me this month that many times she could say she got a grand total of 44 inches or 3 ft 8 inches total. im sure you can do the math.. He is nearly 3 times my size both length and girth. She is on her way over there now so when she comes back and drops the recorder on my lap then I will report the details. till then ...I guess I will just play with my little man clit..

So basically she was there for 4 hours 10- 2 . This guy must be like superman cuz the whole time she is fucking or sucking him and cumming all over his cock repeatedly. Its fucking insane to think we could ever have normal sex ever again. Or that she could ever get off on my little dick. She is so addicted to his cock that while we are fucking I just mention his cock and she gets wet and if by chance she is able to cum on my dick that way, then I am done . I instantly cum but not this guy when she is going nuts on his dick , he just keeps plowing through the orgasms . literally 1 after another. Make no doubt that I might be misreading her , SHE IS IN LOVE WITH HIS COCK!!

So today is the 25th and she is going out with her mom after work but who knows whats up after. All I know is she didnt fuck me when she got home lastnight after the assault on her pussy at Alvins. In fact we have only fucked 4 times this month and one of the times she got off mine and went to his house.

Pretty much an absolute certainty that she is falling in love with him.She is trying to find things im doing wrong to justify leaving me im thinking. She says thats not true but I guess time will tell..

Although they tried lastnight tonight they did it again.

oct 30th the 9th time this month. She said it was amazing he made her squirt the first orgasm to the last orgasm with him dumping his load on her stomach. All this while I was sleeping. I had passed out ... last night he called her at 3 am she drove there but he had passed out so she didnt gt any... today is halloween so if they do it today they hit 10 times in a month we will see. we know its not my pussy anymore...its his. I just got finished listening to over an hour and a half onslaught of my girls pussy. I said to her, were you cuming the entire time? and she said pretty much and even said she squirted on her first orgasm. Listening to the tape , that would be after just 1 minute and 42 seconds but she wasnt cuming when she was giving him head and that was for almost twenty minutes in the begining and 15 minutes in the middle. So for 1 hour an 12 minutes he was pounding away and she was having orgam after orgasm. When she gets home I am passed out on the bed naked with a huge black dildo that i was going to use on her . So she saw it laying there im pretty sure and probably thought i fucked myself till I passed out . Which I didnt do ....but the thought did cross my mind. So anyway the final count for cocktober was 9 sessions for just over 25 hours, And myself , 7 sessions for just about 2 -1/2 hours....So its getting a little lopsided but she cant cum with me unless vibrator and dildo and when she does cum.... bet your ass my dick is in my hand...lol till next time..

Nov 1st.... Well as you probably predicted it wasnt going to be long. She was there for about 2 hours . She said its been better but they both nutted and she sounded like she never stopped.

Nov 5th They are at it again .... She left at 3 got home around 5 . I havnt listened to the recording yet ....to be continued....

Nov10th &11th She left over to his house around 11pm. This is number 3 for him and lastnight was number 2 for me and of course I left her craving a cock that could fill her up all the way and can make her cum on call it seems. Anyway she gets back after a hour and a half of just might be the best recording yet. She got off what sounded like one continuious orgasm . And repeatedly told him that her pussy belonged to him and claiming her love for his cock not to mention how fucking sexy he is etc etc. Lot of whispering on this one and she supposedly doesnt know what she had whispered.

Last night Nov 13th We listened to the recording together and half way thru she starts to tickle my ball sack. So i start slowly stroking my little dick and she holds down on the base so she doesnt touch my dick and lets me stroke it. She reassures me that it will do nothing for her exept tease her and make her mad....as with the night before the second i put my dick in her I cum. Just forging her need for Al to get her ....

Funny as i type this he is texting her so here it is on

sunday the november 13th and she will be heading over there soon im sure. yep he wants a quickie and she tells him as long as she gets a long session later.This is a new record... she was out the door in less than 5 minutes.... I guess the last session left a mark lol...well she said 13 times this month to surpass october and the 9 times it was worth... Up till then 4 times a month or once a week was the standard... Today marks the 4th time this month and if she holds him to it she will be getting a longer session later. With 17days left this month , She will have to step it up to hit that magic number 13 ... with me she said 5 times to be continued............... but i dont doubt for a minute she will at the very least break the record

Friday nov 18th Well lastnight she was asked to go over there for a threesome but she declined. Apparently his cousin is in town and he wanted to show him a good time. She was tired cause then he even wanted her to come over and just do him but she was in bed. So anyway this week I got some but the only time she even came close to cumming is when I asked her about him and his fucking her while she had an earplug in and we listened to one of the recordings of him fucking the living shit out of her.

So anyway, tonight she is going there. We just got back from dinner at 7:10 and she wasted no time in texting him and within 10 minutes she is in the shower and will be out the door by 7:45. So I will be adding a new entry on tonight like I do ....in a nutshell because details are very few when she gets back . All i get is a tape recorder with a new recording of my girl having one body racking orgasm after another. His rod is her god thats for sure .... We all know who is the real owner of her pussy is..... And its not me.... more to come and she will cum more for sure over there than if she stayed home....

Sun Nov 20th So she forgot her jacket there.... totally on purpose, She tried to go get it yesterday but his girlfriend was there and she was telling me that she wouldnt do him anyway .... not after the awesome sex we had after Alvin fucked the shit out of her Fri night. In fact lets back up to friday night .... When she went over there she knew damn well his cousin would be there too. Still she went she acted like she didnt know but come on.... anyway she had a 3some even if it wasnt for all that long . She claims she sucked his dick while Alvin did her doggy style. All I have is audio and I cant decipher but anyhow she came home and sat on my dick to show me how badly he has damaged her pussy for me. And I have to admit, it is like im sticking my dick into a complete stranger. He has done big changes to her pussy. not only is the size difference but it respondes to black cock alot differently then to mine. to be cont..........So anyway she was over there again today for about 2 hours and was home by noon. He had started texting her at 6 am and she mentioned it to me the minute i was awake. She acted like I asked her to go but that is not the case and she was already wet thinking about it..Point is that the awesome sex we supposedly had friday night that kept her from fucking him saturday( which is bs dudes chick was over) Well today it wasnt going to stop her from getting his rod... I guess it wasnt that awesome ....right? till next time... and yes there will be a next time ....

Monday Nov 21 a whole day later and while im at work apparently they planned a quickie for halftime but of course it has been no quickie she went over there over 2 hours ago and still isnt home.... She was very set in the fact that she was going and there really was nothing I could do about it... So I am sure she is just getting that pussy assaulted and gaped out so when she returns she wont even beable to feel me in her. This is what keeps her going back. There is not a chance in hell that i could ever even come remotely close to being able to fuck anyone as good as he fucks my girl. She says when she thinks about sex, its his cock she thinks about. When im fucking her she thinks about him within 30 seconds. When she sees a black guy she thinks of him and when im not home and she plays with herself it is always to him.... To me that sounds like love but she claims he is just a toy.... we will see

So apparently things must have been getting to serious because he wanted to take a break.... for a whole week so here it is.

wednesday Dec2nd and i am going on a 1-1/2 day fishing trip and wouldnt you know it . As soon as I arrive down in oceanside she sends me a text she is going in and quits responding to me. You can hear my numerous calls and texts and all of them go unanswered as she is locked in on what she has been craving for the last week. Granted she was only there for an hour and on the tape it sounds like she only had 4 or 5 orgasms, so it could have been worse i suppose but I was still pissed. Pissed for the fact she deliberatly waited till i was gone to go over there. Now she is acting like she doesnt need it and its all over. But im thinking thats what she wants me to think so she can quit recording and just start sneaking over there... I dont know maybe im paranoid. All i know is there 2 year anniversary is coming up and I highly doubt this is over.... we will see

dec 7th

she went over and got drilled on for a couple hours and the very next day she is back again. I will say this , that she has tried with me to get off but is simply unable to. My diclit falls so short that it is starting to make her mad. So on

Dec 15th she went over there at 6pm and didnt come home till midnight. This pissed me off once she went past 5 hours. The thing is that she responded to my texts and was unable to make him cumso she wasa going to stay longer . She textwed me this twice. I am listening to the recording now and by all accounts this was the best session she has ever had. One orgasm after another and her repeating over and over how much she loves his cock.

This guy is like a superhuman sex machine and loves her pussy as much as she loves his cock. I would be so selfish to try stopping her from seeing him. Plus I doubt if I could. Right now I am still listening and I am only into it an hour and 17 minutes and I lost count how many times she has came. Seriously, well over 15. She stayed there another 5 and a half hours . How is that even possible?? I will add more as it becomes available......Ok I listened to it all and it is just not normal for a guy to go that long and make a girl cum that many times. My girl to make it worse. To top it off she told him atleast as many times how she loves his cock or how amazing it is and that her pussy needs his cock..... And then tells him he keeps getting better everytime. During the little cool down sessions there was quite a bit of whispering so I am really over it. So when I say something to her about it she says she would give it all up for me if I want ..... Me the guy that cant make her cum anymore unless I use a toy and even then we have to be fantasizing about his cock . So why would she even want to be with only me? I mean keep it real, there is no way possible you could convince me that she could be faithful . But whatever, it is what it is. I brought this shit on , she has just taken it to this level...

December 20th , Well im sure its been a long 5 days for her cuz she has been wanting to go finish her job since the very next day. He has his kids so yesterday didnt happen as much as they both wanted it to. But bet your ass today it will go down ..... and it is right now. Once again left me with my dickclit in my hand. It is 2 pm so lets see how long they go today. I have a feeling he is going to wham bam and see ya bcause his son is still there he just went out for a while. Unless he is trying to let him fuck her too. which I wouldnt put it passed him... to be continued........So she was there just an hour which is a quickie for him. I guess it had been a while since he nutted but she was able to help him out with that so he showed his appreciation and dumped his massive load all over her face her hair and chest. She says she was covered with his jiz.... more to come So anyway she ended up fucking me with her abused pussy and I got off immediatly and wouldnt you know it but the very next day I am home with her all day and she was in a bad mood, finally at abnout 3 pm she went to rite aid and I went xmas shopping.

December 21st I was gone about a hour and didnt hear my phone or the 9 messages . So she called to inform me that she is on her way over there for a quickie......No matter how you look at it they are finishing off this year with a huge surge. A surge that has done irrepairable damage to her pussy. A surge that is telling me how 2017 is going to be........

December 24th

Its christmas eve and last night in bed we watched interracial porn like always and she played with herself and wouldnt fuck me or touch my dick for that matter. She said she was going to get it today and after 3 or 4 hours of playing with ourselves we both nutted....Now its 930 am and Al texts her "now" so with in 15 minutes she is on her way to fuck him.... After denying me all night . Pretty obvious who owns that pussy.....I will give as much detail when she returns...
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